Darn Them Socks!

I have kids and if they aren't outgrowing their shoes (more on that at a later date) they are wearing out their socks. After watching my wife buy more socks almost every few months, I had to put a stop to that needless spending. Now I can boast that we buy socks maybe once a year now. Impressive, isn't it? Well, I'm happy to pass along the knowledge I've gained. Pay attention and don't be shy to print out this page.

First I'll highlight the basics all of which any thrifty person already knows.

In the summer go barefoot or wear sandals 100% of the time.

Socks made of synthetic material last longer than natural fibers so do away with cotton.

Small holes can be sewn up.

Wrap socks with scrap paper before putting on shoes.

Eventually you will come across a sock that just can't be mended, so before you throw out those old socks:

If the footie is worn out but the elastic is OK:

Trim the elastic for sweatbands. Save any long strings for darning holes.

If the elastic is worn out but the footie is OK:

I call these “Sock Savers”. Cut off the elastic to use the footie as a protective slipper, doubling up your socks with the good sock worn inside, the protective footie outside. This will help prevent the good sock from getting worn. Don't worry about mismatching colors, all you can see is the top part of a sock when your shoes are on.

-OR-

You can use rubber bands to hold up socks, but that doesn't work very well.

Two good footies and two good elastics:

Sew them together to create a matching pair of socks.

What to do with all those unusable footies and elastics:

Tie them to a stick – now they are a mop! If you are like me, I have no carpet in my home – all linoleum! When your kids aren't running and slipping around the house (doing your dusting for you) you have a mop, no electricity required to clean the floors (no need to own a vacuum cleaner.)

There's no limit to what you can do to save your money on socks, here are more lessons I've learned through the years:

Carpeted floors wear out socks faster so if your floors are carpeted, allow your kids to either be barefoot or wear shoes or slippers in the house, no exceptions.

If your white socks are still in good repair but you can't get them white anymore you can dye them a color (wash with dark colors, don't actually go out and buy dye). Now you have colored socks for business or church attire.

Wash socks only if they look dirty. If they smell bad you can skip subjecting them to the harmful beatings of the washing machine by airing them out on the clothesline. You can speed up the process by killing the germs with the microwave oven first – it's the germs that make them smell bad, not dirt.

Go now and stop wasting money on socks.

Happy to be at your service.

- Bob

Top Ten Free Lunches At Work

Greetings, fellow saving opportunists. Today, through the kindness of my soft heart, I am bringing to you my secret to finding those free lunches (and dinners) at work. All of these ideas are centered around my experiences working in large offices so some of which may not apply to you, but I hope at least one does.

1. The conference. Does your employer host conferences or assemblies for your sales reps, etc? Is it fair that these guys, many of whom may not work for your company, get free lunch while you and your coworkers don't? Time to get back. Know what time the meeting starts and be there about ten minutes early when the line into the room is long. Get in line. Follow the line to the sign-in table. Tell the host an assumed name and complete a name tag sticker. When the host says you are not on the list, simply tell him your (pretend) employer sent you as a late addition. The host's whole job is customer service so they aren't going to prevent you from attending, (sometimes you can circumvent the host table altogether.) After that it's quite simple – grab a plate, fill it up, then return to your desk with your free lunch.

2. Day-old bagels. Often people will bring in bagels and cream cheese for their office team and there are always leftovers. However, no one ever eats the day-old bagels but everyone will not like it if you take the left-over bagels home with you the same day they were brought in. So just take them home with you on the second day – after you grab the cream cheese from the refrigerator. Your kids won't know they are one- or two- day old bagels after you toast them.

3. Potlucks and Birthdays. Job transfers plays a big role to score free food. In a big office people will move around a lot. Those people with whom you formerly worked are excellent contacts to learn of potlucks, birthday celebrations, etc. across all departments. Potlucks always have leftovers and people are happy to go home with empty tupperware. As long as you know a person on that team you have a standing invitation to indulge.

4. Snack Days. Are you on a rotating schedule to bring in snacks? Always sign up for a day you know you will be off.

5. Separation From The Company. Do you know you are about to leave the company (2-weeks notice, temporary assignment is over, etc.) but no one with whom you work knows it? On your last day borrow money for lunch or something with the promise to pay back after the weekend. You're off, scott free. If you see that person sometime down the road, act none the wiser and say, “Yeah, that was a surprise, they (management) just let me go at the last minute and wouldn't allow me to return to my desk or, in your case, see you one last time to pay you back. Unfortunately I don't have any cash on me right now...”

6. Charity Food Purchases. From time to time someone will ask you to buy Girl Scout cookies or butterbraids for their brats' club or school, it's inevitable. Cookies get eaten up fast so don't even bother with those. In the case of frozen foods, such as butterbraids or cookie dough, people will store them in the break-room refrigerator, some of whom will forget they ever put them in there. After a couple of weeks, (I was willing to wait three Fridays,) they are as good as forgotten. Often a person's name will be written on the item. When you start sneaking home the treats, start off with people whom you like the least or don't know at all. Every few days bring another one home, working your way through all the treats. Meanwhile, find a “spontaneous” opportunity to remind someone that they have a treat in the freezer, that way you have someone who will later vouch for you that you are the type of person who reminds others of their forgotten treasures, and not the thief.

7. Scheduled Refrigerator/Freezer Clean-ups. Your office may have a cleaning crew who will clean the refrigerators in addition to the office, but they don't clean the refrigerators every day. Let's say, for example, your refrigerators are cleaned out every pay-day Friday and the freezers cleaned the last Friday of every month. Offer to come in late, work late, or just work overtime (or off the clock you go-getter) on those days. With most of the work staff left for home and the cleaning crew about to arrive, everything in the refrigerators is about to be thrown away, but not everything because you brought to work your thermo-grocery bag. It will be a potluck-style dinner at the Skin-Flints tonight! (ps. If some food is in tupperware, have your wife wash it, then bring it back to work over the weekend or early Monday morning.)

8. Management Buys Lunch – Your Team or Department. This one is a no-brainer. After everyone has had their turn, grab a large second helping, cover it and put your name on it, save it for lunch tomorrow.

9. Management Buys Lunch – Another Team or Department. After a couple hours the lunch left-overs will be consolidated at put into the refrigerator. Once it's in here, it's open season. Go after this food without worry because people will often tell their friends, “Hey, we had plenty of left-overs from our lunch, come on down and grab some for yourself.” No one can prove you weren't invited by the team's staff or management.

10. Classes. Some companies have training classes. Find out which ones, or which teachers, bring in lunch for the classes. Sign up for those classes, you go-getter!